Pop-Up Ritual

I love doing ritual magick but I don't always love the rigidity of the way it's often practiced.  I want my ritual practice to be adaptable enough to be done anywhere and anytime it's needed, with whomever wants to join me.  Don't get me wrong, a complicated and exactingly crafted ritual can be a beautiful thing - but I tend to save that for rare major workings.  Most of the time I do magick on the fly, including rituals.

Like so many things, I first started doing ritual back as an undergrad at Wellesley.  We had an amazing group that focused on learning new things and trying out new practices.   We were students just getting into magick, what else would we be doing?  We met every week and would often begin meetings by asking if anyone needed any magickal help.  Most of the time someone needed something (help studying for an exam, healing of an injury, dealing with a conflict, etc.); so, we would circle up, call the quarters, and do some magick.  We were a diverse group with Wiccans, Witches, Druids, Red Road, and a few other practitioners, so we didn't exactly have a set liturgy.  We'd improvise on a theme and just figure out what we were doing as we went along.  Every ritual was totally different, but they pretty much always met our needs.  It was an extremely open and flexible way of doing ritual and I loved it.

Ah my Alma Mater

I still love it.  I pretty much never do something the exact same way in multiple rituals.  Yes, over the years I've developed a pretty standard way of casting a circle and calling the quarters, but they always vary at least a little from ritual to ritual and they're the closest thing to standard liturgy that I've got. I like being able to feel the energies around me when I'm doing ritual and then adapt the ritual accordingly.  Shouldn't the way you call air into a circle be different if you're standing on a wind swept bluff as opposed to when you're indoors?  Should you summon, stir, and call forth a spirit that you can feel is already standing right beside you or just acknowledge it's presence and thank it for showing up early?  I've always felt that such adaptability is key for an effective practice.

Ritual is, in essence, a formal framework for worship, magickal practice, or a bit of both.  In my practice a ritual needs to have: a statement of intent/focus, an opening, calling of supportive powers (elements, spirits, deities, etc.), a working (devotional, magickal, or both), thanking of supporting powers, and a closing.  As long as those elements are present, preferably in that order, you've got yourself a ritual.  To me, it doesn't really matter whether your celebration of Artemis takes the form of a 15 minute recitation of an original poem in perfect iambic pentameter or is just a few moments of heartfelt meditation and lighting some incense.

Oh My Gods Archive

The exact execution of any step in a ritual is far less important than the focus and intent used in performing it.  I've been to large, carefully executed, highly formalized ritual that had less power and meaning than a five minute improvised ceremony to honor a pretty tree found in a park.  It's a lot like feeling the power and beauty of a heartfelt jazz improv as opposed to a coldly, if perfectly, played Mozart concerto; like music, magick has to have soul!

Of course, nothing is ever quite as simple as that.  Unless you're really comfortable with public speaking (something my inner attention whore loves with an unholy passion), improvising in front of strangers can be intimidating.  If you're inexperienced you might not know what to say; you may fear being judged or laughed at.  It's important that ritual space be safe space.  I like to begin my public rituals by stating that there is no right or wrong way to do something (within reason) and that judgements are strictly prohibited.  When I ask for participants I try to be fairly specific about what roles are needed and any constraints on how something can be done (usually time or adapting to the needs of the particular atendees).  If someone wants to participate that doesn't know what to do or feels comfortable doing something alone I ask for a more experienced practitioner to help the newbie plan what to do and how to do it (think magickal spotter). 

This brings us to the idea of pop-up ritual.  I have a dream of building a network of magickal folk who can come together, without prior preparation, and perform ritual whenever it's wanted.  Just like you see pop-up retail stores appearing temporarily where they find a need, I want to see pop-up ritual that can be set up in a flash anywhere, anytime, with whomever happens to show up.  I want to see open, inclusive ritual being practiced in my community. If you're in the Seattle area check out Illustris on Facebook and see where you can participate in my pop-up rituals.

Pop Culture Magick: Con Edition - Part I

The weekend before last I attended the ever glorious Emerald City Comicon (ECCC).  There is no better place for a pop culture magick (PCM) practitioner can go to fuel their practice than a convention.  In this post I'll talk a bit about how you can work a comic/pop-culture convention to better your PCM practices.  In my next post I'll talk a bit about what you can do magickally to improve your convention experience. 

So...many...toys!

One of the best things about doing PCM is the availability of magickal tools.  You can take toys, t-shirts, art, and swag of all kinds from your favorite fandom and turn them into magickal tools (see an earlier post for more info).

There is no greater concentration of potential magickal items than on a convention show floor.  There were hundreds of amazing vendors of every possible description at ECCC.  You could get everything from custom artwork, plushies, action figures, swords, clothing, armor, jewelry, and more.  I saw things that I didn't even know existed being sold on that show floor. Come prepared with a solid budget or you can get yourself into a lot of trouble.

I made two fun purchases this year.  I found the booth for one of my favorite comics, Kill Shakespeare, quite by accident while trying to escape the crush of the Friday afternoon crowd.  They had some incredibly fun t-shirts available, including one of Shakespearean villains.  If you're a fan of this blog you know that I love both Shakespeare and working with villains in my magick.  Next time I need to do a spell that requires the potency and scale of a Shakespearean villain I know what my ritual garb will be ;)

My most exciting (and priciest) find was a licensed replica of Harry Dresden's original shield bracelet.  If you haven't read any of the Dresden Files (oh for shame!), they are an urban fantasy series about a wizard-for-hire living in Chicago who battles baddies of all shapes and sizes.  One of his most important tools is a charm bracelet where each charm is fully imbued with a potent protection spell.  I plan to charge each of the charms on my bracelet to do exactly that.  Not only will it have the power of the intent that I put into it, but also the power of the belief of all the readers of this 15 year (and counting) series - talk about taking advantage of power that's already sitting there ripe for use.

Another incredibly useful PCM tool that you can often only get at conventions is custom artwork.  Many artists will take commissions for custom work at or before conventions.  If one of your favorite artists is available take advantage of that and have them make a piece whose components you can use in your magickal works.  Imagine the prosperity spell you could craft using a piece of custom art as a focus.  As a bonus, art purchased directly from the artist almost always has stronger energy than art that's gone through an intermediary - less energy dilution good!

The options are just about endless in for this sort of thing and it's a great way to both improve the potency of your magick and support your favorite artists.

Energy, energy everywhere! As far as the mind's eye can see!

The energy at a convention is utterly unlike anything else.  The closest thing to it would be a major concert or sporting event, but sustained over several days rather than just a few hours.  There are so many overwhelming emotions pouring everywhere: excitement for all that can be done, joy at seeing your favorite writers/artists/actors, frustration from waiting in lines, etc.  That nearly unlimited energy can be harnessed if you take care.

In most ritual magick you set up sacred space, call on helpful energies and entities, raise energy, and then direct that energy towards your goal.  At a convention you can kind of skip all that and just scoop up the copious energy around you and send it off to wherever it needs to go.

Of course, just because energy is strong and available doesn't necessarily mean it's in tune with your goals.  The energy of a bunch of squeevy dudes drooling over pinups probably won't help you ace your feminist theory class and the energy of a vendor arguing with convention staff won't help your prosperity spell.  Take your time to walk the floor to feel out the energies.  Find the energy that feels most sympathetic to your goals and take a bit from that area.  If you're doing a spell on the fly just be sure to walk through that area when you need to gather energy.  If you're setting up for a larger rite you can always charge a stone, sigil, or talisman while walking through that area.

You can also utilize the energy in panels in pretty much the same way.  Most actors and audiences put off a tremendous amount of energy during convention panels - the more exciting and dynamic the panel, the more energy gets thrown about the room.  You can either come in with a plan to use the type of energy you expect to be generated in the panel, or you can do something on the fly if particularly juicy energy starts flowing.  

I had the pleasure of seeing many panels featuring truly kick-ass women at ECCC.  If I had wanted to so a spell to enhance my self-confidence or assertiveness I would have been absolutely spoiled for choices with so much empowering energy around.  Of course I didn't think about it at the time because I was too busy fangirling.  I'm ok with that.

Sweet Tesla is that...?

Conventions are also filled to the brim with major and minor celebrities.  They're one of the few places where you actually have the chance to interact with your idols - be they artists, writers, actors, etc.  Getting to meet a beloved celebrity (however briefly) is thrilling and at a con you almost always have either an autograph or a photo to take away from that meeting.  That little token can be used (mindfully) as a focus for sympathetic magick. I had the great please of having photo's taken with John Barrowman and Clark Gregg this year.  If I ever need to do a spell for confidence or accepting who I am I've got the perfect focus.

There is on SUPER-HUGE caveat to any magick involving living human beings as symbols - don't mess with the people themselves!  Similes are your friends in this type of magick.  By all means do a spell to "have strength and poise like Haley Atwell when she played Agent Carter."  Do not do a spell to "have Haley Atwell's strength and poise."  Do not suck energy out of your idols; they have enough demands on them already and do not need you making things worse.  Also be careful not to project your expectations onto a celebrity.  Just because they created your favorite character does not mean they act like or have the values of that character.  Celebrities are just people, often charismatic and brilliant people, but still just people.

Part II - Con Survival

For similar info check out:
Pop Culture Magick Index
Magick at Concerts

Pop Culture Magick: Working with Villains

First off, a huge thank you to all who attended my workshop at Pantheacon! You people are the absolute best.  I really mean that.  There is nothing more rewarding than being able to share what I do and actually see the look of understanding on peoples faces as they find concepts that work for them.  It gives me all kinds of warm fuzzies :)

I've been asked by several people to do a more in-depth write-up of the material for folks who weren't there and for those who didn't take notes and this is it.  If you're not already familiar with the basics of Pop Culture Magick (PCM) I suggest you go over to my PCM index and read through my earlier articles.

Why Work With Villains?

When choosing what pop culture character you want to work with for any particular magickal act; the choice ultimately it comes down to figuring out what character you feel most comfortable with that can help you achieve your goal in the manner you want it achieved.  For most people most of the time, that character is going to be a hero because they're generally helpful, hardworking, and kind.  However, there are circumstances where the moral forthrightness of your average hero can hinder your goals more than help them (and not just when you're being naughty).

It is critical that you feel comfortable with whatever character you choose to work with.  The sympathy and connection we feel with a character is what makes PCM so effective.  For those of us that do the occasional bit of ethically grey or unambiguously black magick it can be difficult to achieve that kind of connection with your standard hero.  (I'm pretty sure Captain America would give me his disappointed face if I tried to work with him.)  Villains, on the other hand, tend to be very non-judgmental.  It's not like they can take the moral high ground with you, unless you've been a very naughty monkey indeed.  Not being overly burdened with morality, villains tend to embrace whomever can make their existence more entertaining.

Even if your magickal goal is a pure as the driven snow, sometimes you just don't have the time or energy to get all your moral ducks in a row before acting.  As they say, desperate times call for desperate measures.  Villains are generally unburdened by guilt and as a result will do whatever is necessary to achieve their goal.  Many of them tend to be ruthless, efficient, and thorough; though a goodly number are also insane, capricious, and flighty - choose your villain carefully.

For What Types of Workings are Villains Best Suited?

Surprisingly (or not), villains are good at a lot more than simply wreaking havoc upon the unsuspecting.  The following list contains some magickal goals you might consider working on with a villain.

• Bringing hidden things into the light (often being dragged kicking and screaming)
• Villains are exceptionally good at ferreting out hidden secrets and exposing them.  My favorite example of this is Sweet from Buffy the Vampire Slayer - a demon who reveals the truth of a situation by making the people involved sing.  (If you haven't seen the episode Once More With Feeling, I'm not sure we can be friends anymore.)
• Shaking up stagnant energy (also known as "running amok")
• There are many villains in pop culture whose goals involve "saving" society from itself, usually by tearing down the established order of things.  When things in your life have ground to a halt and you're willing to take more extreme measures to get energy moving again you can consider working with villains like Ra's Al Ghul from Batman or  Ozymandias from Watchmen.
• Standing up for things frowned upon by society at large
• As with the above, many villains are anti-establishment and are happy to work against prevailing societal mores.  A great example of this is Dracula - a character that in many of his incarnations represents an unleashing of forbidden desires and a threat to society (I'm particularly fond of the version from Carlos Fuentes's Vlad for this purpose). 
• Persuasion (manipulation if we're being totally honest)
• Many of the best villains are absolutely as slick as they come.  They could sell ice to an Eskimo, charm the pants off of your mother, and convince just about anyone to do just about anything.  Just a few of the many villains who can fit this bill are Hannibal Lector, Lex Luthor, Sher Kahn, Loki, etc.
• Focus and single-minded pursuit of a goal (regardless of collateral damage or personal cost)
• If you find yourself constantly being distracted from achieving your goals you can call on villains for help, as many of them are absolutely obsessed with achieving their own goals.  Just be careful, as you may end up just as obsessed as they are.  Some examples of this are: Voldemort, Amora (from the Thor comics), and Fiona Goode (from AHS: Coven).
• Justice/Revenge
• A lot of villains raison d'etre is to take revenge on those who they believed have wronged them and many would be only too happy to help you to do the same (as ruthlessly as possible).  A good example of this is the Penguin (particularly from Batman Returns).  It's also a good cause for a "villain for hire" like Moriarty from the BBC Sherlock.  Keop in mind that there are also a lot of totally ruthless anti-heros that would do just as good of a job such as The Punisher, Eric Draven (from The Crow), and the Bride (from the Kill Bill movies).
• Hexing
• There comes a time in every practitioner's life when they just need to hex the ever living fuck out of someone.  There are plenty of villains that would gleefully help you to do so.  Think Bellatrix Lestrange.  There are consequences to doing something like this.  Don't be stupid about it.

The Rules

Like any other kind of magick, there are rules (more like guidelines) for successfully working with villains.

Rule 1 - Version Control

I have a whole blog post from last year on versions control: Who's Your Doctor.  If you haven't read it yet I suggest you do so (that way I don't have to rehash everything). 

While version control is important in any kind of PCM, it's doubly so when working with villains.  One of the primary characteristics of many villains is that they are trixy bastards and generally enjoy making trouble. Being extremely careful and explicit about exactly which version of a character you want to work with can save you a lot of trouble.  Such specificity ensures that you get the version of the character that has exactly the attributes you want to work with and nothing extraneous or unexpected (but always expect the unexpected - we'll talk about that more in a little bit).

Rule 2 - Know Your Goal

Before working with a villain (or any other entity) it is important to know exactly what you want to accomplish - and what you do not want to accomplish as collateral damage.  Working with a villain is a lot like working with faeries or Goetic demons - they will do exactly what you say, rather than what you intend, and they will do whatever they want within the rules you set up for them.  You can't set up your rules if you don't know exactly what you want.

Rule 3 - Know Thyself

You've chosen to work with a villain. Why? Are you really OK with the methods your chosen villain is likely to employ in the pursuit of your goals? Are you willing to accept responsibility for the consequences of your actions? Are you confident you will be able to keep your villain in line or will it go rogue the second you let your guard down? Are you comfortable with the price the villain wants for doing your work? Unless you're comfortable with the answers to those questions then you need to rethink what you're doing.

Rule 4 - Healthy Limits

As mentioned above, it's important to give a villain very strict limits as to what they are allowed to do in your name. Most villains will walk all over you if given half the chance.  Be very, very careful to explicitly set down what they are and are not allowed to do, to whom, why, when, where, etc.  Write it down on physical paper.  Do not fuck around with this.   

Rule 5 - Expect the Unexpected

You are not perfect and most villains will mess with you if they can.  Even if you've set down perfect rules, even if your goals are in perfect alignment with the villain's character, even if you've given them everything they ask for, villains can usually find a way to do something you could not predict.  Think of your worst possible case scenario of working with a villain - it just might happen.  No matter how good you are it is always possible for something to go wrong.  If you're not OK with that, rethink what you're doing. 

Payment

Like working with any other spirit/metaphysical entity, villains should receive something from you in exchange for their help.  In fact, this is far more important when working with villains than when working with heroes.  You do not want to end up owing a villain a "favor" (think of it like owing a mob boss a favor - do not want!). 

What villains want in exchange for their help varies wildly from character to character.  For some being asked to cause a bit of trouble is a reward in and of itself, but most want a bit more.  Come prepared with what you're willing to pay them, you don't want to let them come up with something on their own.  Think of something that is very specific to the character you're working with.  You might offer Fiona Goode a nice dry martini and some cigarettes while you might offer Hannibal Lector a gourmet meal.  You might offer Dracula a bit of your own blood, while you might offer Sweet a painful truth of your own.  Be sure that you don't offer too much of yourself - if you give a villain an inch it might take rather more than you anticipated.

A Caveat

Villains are not nice.  Even if they like you, even if you've got a great working relationship with them, never forget that they are villains.  Trust cautiously.  Take the greatest of care in all your dealings with them and be prepared to accept the consequences.

Further, working with villains can affect who you are.  You are deliberately entangling your personal energies with theirs and that can have great impact on who you are.  It can change you.   If you decide to work with villains (particularly if you're being ethically...ambiguous), I highly recommend you do some unquestionably positive work to help balance things out.  Go out and do some volunteer work in your community, donate to charity, give blood, do something to make the world a better place.  You certainly don't have to, but it's a really good idea.  Think about the person you want to be and make sure that you're not moving away from that person.

Shameless Plug!

Megalithica Books, an imprint of Immanion Press (Stafford, U.K./Portland, OR, U.S.A) is seeking submissions for The Pop Culture Grimoire 2.0.

This anthology explores pop culture magic and Paganism in the 21^st Century. We invite you to share your pop culture magic practice, pop culture Pagan spirituality, and your experiments, spells, and other workings that have integrated pop culture into your spiritual practice.

If you have an interesting idea, we need you to submit a first draft (of the idea, not necessarily the whole article) by March 15th.

Click here for more information

Magickal Community - I Want It

A few weeks ago I attended a local Pagan Pride Day planning meeting down in Tacoma.  The current group running PPD are a hard working and incredibly welcoming group.  It was so nice to walk into a group of people I barely know and instantly feel welcomed and respected.  I knew it was a group where I could make suggestions and give my opinion, and that they’d form their opinions on the quality of what I said, rather than what group I was a part of or who I studied with.  It made me realize just how much I miss being a part of an open-minded local community group.  

When I first started practicing magick, back at Wellesley, I was blessed by being part of an incredible group.  We were all beginners struggling to learn together.  Everyone was pretty much equal and everyone pitched in and helped the group to learn and grow.  In retrospect I realize how incredible that group was.  I found a second family in that group and some of us will be sisters forever, even though we’re spread across the globe now.  The most remarkable thing was that because none of us had any “lineage” in the craft, we could only judge each other on what we actually said and did.  We had no past to be judged on.  

When I came back to Seattle I expected to be able to find local groups that would be as open and welcoming as the group I left.  To say that I was disappointed by what I really found would be a gross understatement.  What I found was a community shattered by politics.  I found people who didn’t care who you were unless you were introduced by someone with status,  I found “open” groups with no interest in even saying hello to new people (let alone welcoming them), and I found it almost impossible to even find the community without an “in.”  My friend and I once went to an open sabbat and spent 30 minutes in a dark room while the group hosting the event came in, late, and one by one passed us by without even saying hello.  When we asked if we were in the right place we received looks that clearly stated we weren’t welcome - even though the event was advertised as open to all.  Gotta love the Seattle freeze.  I’ve found people that wouldn’t give me the time of day because I wasn’t 50; I’ve had others that wouldn’t talk to me because I wasn’t under 25; and goddess help me if I mention that I don’t “embrace the warmth and light of the great mother.”  I once had a fellow practitioner tell me to my face that I was evil for working with Kali - way to be understanding lady.  

I had almost lost hope that there were, in fact, decent groups out here.  Then I started hosting Grey School info booths at the local PPD events.  The thing about PPD events is that their entire purpose is to foster community strength and understanding.  The folks that take the time and trouble to come out to them are, generally, friendly people who genuinely want to talk to new people.  At this point PPD is pretty much the one day a year I spend out in my local community (other than supporting local magickal merchants).  Through PPD I’ve met several local community leaders that don’t make me want to pull my hair out.  (There’s a really terrific Dianic group here - too bad I’m not Dianic.)  

I’ve met some amazing people in the local area, so what on earth is stopping us from coming together?  Terrible inertia? A lack of leadership?  Fear? Come on people, getting together in a coffee shop once a month isn’t exactly rocket science.  I suppose if I want local community I’m going to have to put on my big girl pants and make it happen.  *sigh*

Shadow Magick and Compassion

I've been doing shadow work for so long, I sometimes forget how ooky it can seem from the outside.  Yes, shadow work is dark, difficult, and sometimes scary.  And yes, the magick that derives from all that work is potent, sharp, and has the potential to break things.  But the darkness isn't the point.  The ooky spooky scary bits are there because if you want something special you have to earn it.  The ookiness is a means to an end, not the end in and of itself.  Shadow magick isn't about being angry and dark and wanting to hurt yourself or others - and if you approach it from that point of view you will either change in a hurry or deal with the consequences.  For the Shadow to work for you, your intent actually has to come from a place of compassion.

It's easy to hurl your anger into the darkness; but shadow work isn't easy.  Real shadow work is about facing the darkness and having compassion for it.  It's about coming face to face with your flaws, with your fears, and both forgiving yourself for your weakness and forgiving the world for allowing the thing you fear to exist.  It's not about conquering your fears; it's about learning to live with them.  Shadow work is about seeing yourself and the world around you clearly, warts and all, and learning to accept that truth.  The only way I've found to accomplish that without going completely mad is to learn to have real compassion. 

When I tell people that I'm a "black witch" or a "shadow worker," they will usually either say "what does that mean" or they will completely freak out.  The freak out is rare and it always surprises me a little.  You see, I don't tell just anyone that I'm a shadow worker - people whose only exposure to the spooky is television will inevitably react uncomfortably - I generally only tell other practitioners and I generally expect other practitioners to be able to look at my aura and realize that I'm not evil.  Sadly, that's not always the case.  There are always those folks who were taught that anything outside their particular brand of magick is evil (anyone who calls themselves a white witch will always react badly to someone who calls themselves a black witch, regardless of what either one means by those terms), and they do not tend to like me very much.  It's always a little disheartening to see that kind of knee-jerk prejudice in my own community.  I expect an abrahamic fundamentalist to object to what I do, I don't expect it from my own people.  It always makes me sad when people who should know better never bother too look beneath the label to find out what shadow workers actually do.  Maybe it bother me because my own reaction to something I fear is to find out all I can about it (this almost always alleviates me fears), so I have trouble understanding why other people don't do the same.

You see, people who are afraid of shadow workers are actually quite ridiculous.  It's almost impossible to become adept at shadow work without developing a deep rooted sense of compassion and understanding.  An adept has to learn to look at their own flaws every day without melting into a useless heap on the floor (this can be rather difficult), and one of the side effects of this skill is the ability to see those same flaws in others.  And let me tell you, it's really difficult not to feel at least some compassion for someone (regardless of how awful their behavior) when you see that their doing it because they have the same damned flaws you've got, that they just haven't dealt with yet.  It's hard to sustain anger with someone who you can see only lashed out because they don't know how to handle their own pain or fear.  This doesn't mean shadow workers all turn into Mother Theresa - hell no - but it does mean that our knee-jerk reactions aren't terribly violent and don't usually last very long.  The only "curse" a shadow worker is likely to lob at another person is one to make them see themselves more clearly and to develop a better understanding of what their doing - nothing more than what we voluntarily do to ourselves every day. 

Sure, the process of becoming an adept at shadow magick is difficult and often painful, but that doesn't make us bastards or masochists or anything else.  All it makes us is honest people who don't lie to themselves.  To be afraid of us just means you're afraid of yourself and we remind you of what you aren't willing to do.  Fear is a natural and healthy thing, just point it in the right direction.

Ostara Shadow Work

It’s almost that time of year again, springtime.  Yay?  I honestly have very mixed feelings about spring.  On the one hand I love not freezing my ass off at the bus stop, on the other hand I’m not especially enamored of being soaking wet either.  Spring in Seattle is a rather soppy affair, with rather absurd amounts of rain, but less of the biting chill that accompanies it’s winter rains.  I love the occasionally dry (ok, less wet) Saturday for getting to early season hikes and getting back out into nature after the cold dark of winter.  I love witnessing the turn of the seasons and the Wheel of the Year.  But you know what I really don’t love?  Pastels.  I don’t like wearing them and I definitely don’t want them in my rituals.

Don’t get me wrong, I like Ostara.  The Vernal Equinox is full of potent energy for growth and new beginnings.  It’s a very hopeful time and shadow workers often need a good dose of hope more than most.  However, I’d rather gouge out my own eyes than attend a sparkly, shiny, “love and light” ritual.  So, naturally, I do things a little differently.  

This Ostara my ritual is going to be about balance and wholeness.  You can’t have light without dark and at the Vernal Equinox the day and night are of equal length - thus light and dark are symbolically of equal strength.  Instead of celebrating the triumph of light over darkness, I’m going to spend my Ostara recognizing both the parts of me that are light and the parts that are dark and what those things give me.  Shadow work is all about recognizing the less pleasant parts of yourself and integrating them, rather than cutting them off or hiding them away - about finding strength in wholeness.  Despite it’s occasionally sinister image, shadow work is actually a very hopeful practice.

My main working is going to involve meditating on some of my less pleasant features.  I’ll write down a list of things I don’t like about myself and try to narrow it down to one specific trait that I think is being the most trouble right now.  Once I’ve selected the one trait to focus on, I’ll burn the list of negative traits - it doesn’t do to dwell on them and there’s always going to be too much to tackle everything at once.  Then I’ll create a sigil to represent that one negative trait.  I’ll use a crayon to draw that symbol on a raw egg and then I’ll hard boil it.  (If I’m feeling like I really need to go the extra mile I might dye the shell black)  Then I’ll eat the egg to symbolize my recognition that my negative trait is a part of me and that I’m willing to work with it, rather than just blacklist it or try to remove it.  

There’s no banishing at Ostara, just gentle acceptance and willingness to grow.  Negative traits can be a problem, but they can also be teachers.  My avoiding a particular project might teach me that I need to solve an interpersonal problem with a teammate, or that I’m afraid of what will happen when the project is finished.  My shocking inability to get off my ass and go running (even though I really want to) teaches me that I’m still clinging to the image I had of myself a year ago (when I ran four times a week) and don’t want to be smacked in the face with how far I’ve fallen off the wagon.  It’s hard to look beyond what we don’t like about ourselves to really figure out why those things bother us so much.  Ostara is the time to be a bit more gentle with yourself and take baby steps.  We’ll save the more drastic measures for the waning half of the year.

Getting Started - Part II - Working With Others

Once you've done a little research and know enough to ask the right questions, it's time to jump into the Magickal/Pagan community.  Depending on where you live that might be as simple as heading to the closest open Sabbat or asking questions at your local metaphysical store.  Or, it might be quite a bit more difficult.

Online Community

In this day and age the magickal community is just a click away - simple right?  If only.  First off, there are a lot of different online communities and each one has a different character.  There's Facebook, Tumblr, Witchvox, PaganPages, PFI, COG, and many other places to choose from.  Some communities are easy to access and are full of people just starting out, others are much more difficult to get into and are often full of elders. You'll have to try them out and see which one best fits who you are and how you like to communicate.

There are two MAJOR drawbacks to online community: lack of vetting and rampant miscommunication.  Anyone can get online and call themselves the grand high poobah of anything.  It can be really hard to know if someone is actually what they claim to be and if the information they're giving you is accurate.  Of course, there are also plenty of trolls out there that will give you bad answers because they think it's funny.  They are douche bags.  This is why I always recommend getting multiple answers to your questions.  The more answers you get, the easier it will be to see which ones are way out of left field - making them less likely to be accurate.  Of course, sometimes the wacky answers are the most inspired, but it's often best to leave that kind of exploration until you've got a better foundation to work with.

The other, and possibly biggest, problem is miscommunication.  Just because you can make yourself understood in person doesn't mean you can make yourself understood online.  Things like humor, sarcasm, emotions, etc., don't really translate well into text alone. It is really easy to be rude unintentionally online and a lot of people are quick to anger at any imagined slight.  Don't get yourself into a Witch War just because someone forgot to add a winky face to show they were joking in a post. 

Also, a lot of magickal concepts are pretty darned complicated and can only be fully explained in person.  Have you ever tried to describe the feeling you get when you know you've cast your circle successfully?  It's so much easier to show someone in person then to try and explain it in text. Images, animated gifs, and streaming video have made things a lot easier in recent years, but there's still no substitute for being there.


In-Person Community

Depending on where you live, finding in-person community can be fairly difficult.  There are still a lot of places where being "out of the broom closet" is still a very risky choice, and even in otherwise open places (college campuses, major cities, etc.) folks still might need to keep their magickal tendencies a secret from co-workers of family.  Joining any in-person community raises the risk of someone who doesn't know your magickal side happening onto it be accident.  If you're deeply in the broom closet you will need to think carefully about how much risk you're willing to bear.

The first step in finding in-person community is often a trip to your local metaphysical shop.  Occult bookstores are a sort of unofficial community center for magickal folk.  They'll often have flyers or notices for local magickal events and the owners usually know what groups exist in the area.  Many metaphysical shops will actually host workshops and rituals with local groups, so they're a great place to start.  Next, check Witchvox.com for listing of local groups and events in your area.  Lots of magickal and, most especially, Pagan groups will post their events up on Witchvox and a lot of elders will have personal listings there.  Any group or person who has posted their contact info on Witchvox should, at least, be willing to talk to folks who are just starting out.

Once you've found a local event or group you'll need to approach them.  Public events are a great first step toward joining a local community.  Groups expect new folks to come to open events, that's why they're open.  They should make and rules and instructions clear in advance, so you'll know what you're getting into and what, if anything, will be expected of you.  Some groups that put on public events are amazing, others are total crap.  Go to as many different things as you can, so you can find out which groups are worth learning more about.

If you find a group that you really like, it's time to look into joining them.  This is where it can get really tricky.  If you've been to an open event chances are you've had a chance to talk to some members of the group and hopefully get to know them.  If you have, that's great.  It will make figuring out your next steps very simple.  Unfortunately, some groups, particularly longstanding ones, will have an insane and complicated dance of manners and etiquette they require from seekers, and sometimes they won't tell you what the rules are.  These aren't the most welcoming groups in the world and I tend to get frustrated with them and go find a more approachable group.  Unfortunately, these finicky groups often have some of the most knowledgeable elders so it's a toss up as to whether they're worth the bother (of course some of these groups are just a hive of ego and meglomania). 

If you do find a group and are able to join them remember - just because you've joined a group doesn't mean you're stuck with them forever.  People grow and change over time.  The group might not be what you thought it was, your needs might chance, the group itself might change.  There will probably come a time when you'll need to move on and that's completely normal.  I don't know anyone that found their perfect group on their first try.  Honestly, I don't know anyone that's found a "perfect" group at all.  Every group has its challenges and it's up to you to decide when to stick it out and when to head for the hills.


Finding A Teacher

Finding a one an one mentor seems to be the Holy Grail for a seeker.  I can remember how badly I wanted some experienced person to take me under his or her wing and reveal the secrets of the universe (like they do in so many books and movies) back when I was starting out. Depending on where you are, who you are, and what you want to learn finding that kind of apprenticeship may or may not be possible.  I can't really give advice for finding that kind of mentor because I never found one. It is much, much easier to find group classes and workshops.

You can find in-person classes the same way you find in-person events and local groups.  Once you find a potential class be sure to check out who's teaching it.  Has it been offered before?  Can you contact people who have taken the class or worked with the teacher?  What's the teacher's reputation?  There are a lot of amazing teachers out, but there are a lot of mediocre (or crappy) ones too.  It should always be possible to contact a teacher and ask questions before you commit (and pay) to any class.

There are also a lot of online classes available these days.  Many well known community elders, like Kerr Cuhulain and T. Thorn Coyle offer online classes - which is a great way to learn from a master.  There are also online schools that can offer a huge variety of magickal learning.  Of course, as a graduate and faculty member, I'm quite biased towards the Grey School: an online non-denominational school (we teach magick, not religion).  At the Grey School you can learn just about every major magickal practice out there while working at your own pace.  It's also got an amazingly supportive community built into it, which I love - like I said, I'm rather biased.

In the end, you'll just have to jump in and see what works for you. 

Back to Part I

Getting Started - Part I

For the most part, this blog is for folks who have been working with magick for a while.  What I do is usually pretty advanced and I rarely bother to spell things out for the new folks.  This post is different.  I spend a lot of time over on Tumblr and have seen so many posts along the lines of, "Hey, I'm new to magick/witchcraft/etc.  Can somebody help me figure out how to get started?"  This is my answer to that question.  These are personal opinions and are not the end all and be all.  I'm a solitary eclectic witch with strong Wiccan tenancies, so my answers are going to be skewed towards that flavor of magick.

First Steps

The first thing any honest seeker should do is read up on magick.  There are tons of books and websites out there with information on getting into magick of all flavors (check out the suggested reading list at the bottom of this entry).  Read as much as you can from as many traditions and styles as you can and find out what resonates with you.  Magick in general and witchcraft in particular is very personal.  There is no one right way for people to do things - but there probably is one way that will feel the best, most natural and fulfilling, to you.  Some books will tell you that you HAVE to do things a particular way to get results - that usually means that the author's tradition says so.  I've never found that to be the case, which is why I'm not a traditionalist.

If you're looking into all this primarily for the religious/spiritual aspect, rather than the magick, finding what feels right is even more important.  Your relationship with deity is just that - YOURS!  Read the poetry and mythology surrounding the path that interests you the most.  Read books that detail those specific paths.  See if you find any particular deities that resonate with you, deities you might want to have a personal relationship with.  Maybe you'll find that you don't want to work with particular deities or pantheons and would prefer to work with archetypes, ideas of nature, or just the energies of the universe - that's just fine.

Maybe you're not interested in finding a new religion at all, but just want to get into the practice of magick - no problems there either.  If you've got an existing religion you're happy with you can bring the practice of magick to it, adapting the forces called on in your work to those of your religion.  If you're an atheist or agnostic you can think of the spirits called on in most spells as mere symbols, or you can omit them and work directly with the energies they personify.  I started out as an atheist witch, but over time came to know forces that felt an awful lot like deity to me so I became a polytheist.  I've also known folks who came into witchcraft believing in deity that switched over to atheism. Many of the books you'll find do approach magickal practices from a religious standpoint - don't discount them just because you don't like the tone.  You can look at the magickal practices of any tradition and learn their techniques without buying into their viewpoint.


Experiment

It's ok to experiment with both religion and magick.  If you're not sure what kind of practitioner you want to be give several different styles a try.  In terms of magick, try a little witchcraft, ritualcraft, meditations, Hoodoo, Ceremonial Magic, etc.  Try out the different styles that interest you.  Almost every tradition has a few beginner practices (spells, meditations, trance work, etc.) that you can try without needing to necessarily be of that tradition.  For example, almost everyone has done the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram at least once, regardless of whether they like Ceremonial Magic or not.  So to, almost everyone has done some form of candle magick or rootwork regardless of whether they consider themselves Hoodoo conjure folk or not.  Experiment and see what feels good to you.

And yes, you can experiment with the Gods.  When I was first starting out I did a number of ritual "meet and greets" with different deities.  You can do a ritual where you say that you want to get to know a deity to find out if you want to work with him/her/it and if he/she/it wants to work with you.  Most deities are pretty understanding of new folks and would rather you got to know them (and vice versa) before committing to anything.  Just be respectful, open, and honest - they'll know if you're not.

The same applies to any group you want to work with or elders you approach as teachers, but I'll talk more about working with others in my next post.

On to part 2 - Working With Others

Suggested Reading List (read all of these and you'll know enough to sort fact from fiction)


Wicca: A Guide for the Solitary Practitioner - Scott Cunningham (an excellent intro)
Witchcraft Today - Gerald Gardner (the one that started the modern movement)
Charge of the Goddess - Doreen Valiente (the best ritual poetry I've ever read)
Complete Book of Witchcraft - Raymond Buckland (also known as "Uncle Bucky's Big Blue Book")
Real Magic - Issac Bonewits (how magick actually works, and doesn't work)
The Spiral Dance - Starhawk (west coast eco-paganism)

The Triumph of the Moon - Ronald Hutton (the real history of modern Wicca)


Witchvox - The best site on the web for information on Wicca and Witchcraft.  Also a great place to find others in your area.
The Wild Hunt - Some of best actual Pagan journalism out there.
The Pagan Newswire Collective - another great Pagan news site
The Grey School - Accessible non-denominational magickal education.
Patheos -  a wonderful site with blogs and info from respected members of the community

Why I'm a Witch

The holidays are interesting.  Being with my family is always a double-edged sword.  I love them dearly, but it makes me sad that I can't be open with them about my religion.  My parents and sister know (though they're not terribly comfortable with it), and my in-laws know (they're super cool that way), but my extended family do not because I'm afraid they'd either disown me or try to convert me all day.  No fun.  All the bother reminds me of just why I do this in the first place.

Way back in my very first post to this blog I told the story of how I came to Witchcraft.  When I reach one of those rough points where it's hard to blend my magickal and mundane lives I like to think back to that first real experience of owning my spirituality.  However, that was an awfully long time ago.  I've had some profound spiritual experiences since then (particularly back when I was an undergrad), but only a few points really stand out as moments when everything fit so perfectly.

Oddly enough, all of my most profound spiritual experiences have been either when I was alone or when I've been in a group and buggered off to do my own thing.  Perhaps that's just the nature of personal gnosis - it's yours and yours alone; or maybe it's just because my deity doesn't play very well with others ;) 

I'm reminded of my first trip to Pantheacon in 2010.  I went to a lot of amazing workshops and attended several rituals.  Most of the rituals were...well..fine.  There was a lot of pomp and circumstance and very little actual energy being moved.  It's hard to do a public ritual where everyone is really involved (I know because I've tried - even succeeded a few times), but a lot of them could have been better. 

Then I had the great fortune of actually making it in the door to T. Thorn Coyle's big Morrighan ritual.  Now that was a ritual!  I've been to plenty of rituals where someone "drew down" a deity and approximately zilch actually happened.  But in this ritual, when that gal called down the Morrighan she was there with us, palpably so.  You could actually feel the room swell in an effort to contain her.  It was an ecstatic experience that I would be hard pressed to describe.  Of course, for me the most profound moment was when I stepped back from the circle and the Morrighan actually spoke to me directly.  At that moment I was both part of the ritual and outside it.  I was physically there participating, but my spirit was totally engaged in this amazing one on one experience just adjacent the ritual.  I know that the ritual facilitated the experience; it got the Morrighan's attention and opened me to where I could listen to her properly.  I've had that kind of experience several times as a solitary, but only rarely before in a group and never in something public.

It's moments like that one than remind me of why I do this.  Being a witch is hard, particularly a shadow practitioner - anyone who says otherwise is doing it wrong, but the rewards are great.  Being able to have profound personal experiences with deity is a reward without peer.  If you've never stood in the full sight of your god then you cannot understand just how powerful it is.  That is why I do this.  It's something anyone can do.  You don't need fancy robes or tools, you don't need a big coven or a renowned teacher.  All you need is the willingness to open yourself to deity and to do your best to align yourself to it, to make yourself beautiful in it's sight - however that works for your deity.  It's not an easy path, but it's worth it.